Is Every Woman in New Jersey A Whore? Television Says Yes!

I am so disappointed in you young ladies!

Lately Bumble has noticed there are quite a few shows on TV about New Jersey females. What gives? What makes the women of New Jersey so compelling? Is it that they are orange? Perhaps. Is it their flair for flair? Maybe. Is it that they are all red blooded American whores? You betcha!

Just when did this fascination with fake orange breasts begin? Bumble can trace it’s roots back to Carmella, Adriana, and Meadow. Since the end of The Sopranos at least 4 “reality” shows featuring New Jersey bimbettes have graced the airwaves. Carmella never would have stood for this! She represented all that was good about the female New Jersey elite. Carmella was a good Catholic, turned a blind eye to her husbands ahem affairs, and supported the economy with a plethora of black and gold credit cards.

Somehow all that was good about New Jersey wives in the Sopranos was lost in translation when applied to Reality TV. Networks instead have chosen to highlight the unwilling matriarch’s worst qualities (bad skin, worse wardrobe) and added a dash of whore (pronounced HOAR). So today we are blessed with at least 4 reality shows featuring badly dressed blinged out MILFS and bad girls. America (and sadly the world thanks to satellite TV) is left with the impression that all New Jersey women are hussies.

Bumble knows what you are thinking… “Not every woman in New Jersey is like that!”

Bumble disagrees. Bumble has been to New Jersey and  god bless them but they are the sluts of the east coast.

Besides if it’s on TV and it’s called “Reality” then this must really be what New Jersey is like. Don’t believe Bumble? Let’s take a look at the women of the real New Jersey…

The Real Housewives of New Jersey – Bravo

Jersylicious- The Style Network

Jersey Couture – Oxygen

Jersey Shore – MTV

In the interest of “Full Disclosure”, Bumble has never actually watched any of these shows. Even so, one can gauge the slutiness from the commercials and simply flipping by them on the tube. Just a cursory glance and you will undoubtedly see a bimbo on any of these shows.

So given this is reality TV, and if it’s on TV it must be true… well New Jersey is chock full o’sluts. Apologies to anyone that is a female in New Jersey and thinks she isn’t a whore. It’s probably just because you aren’t as slutty as your friends. Trust Bumble though, in Iowa you would be a “ho”. Nothing wrong with that! America loves you Snooki and Bumble does too.