FarmVille – Release The Mighty Plantation Or Else!

This weekend FarmVille finally unleashed the Big Ole Plantation for addicts with enough neighbors and coins. The release coincided with the addition of the Chicken Coop, and followed just on the heels of the Baby Turkeys. For those of you that missed it, the Big Ole Plantation costs $250,000 and you must have 20 neighbors to be eligible. The bigger lot is 22 x 22. Bumble has to hand it to FarmVille for keeping the fresh releases and new items coming. It really keeps addicts logging in every day to see the latest developments. It is about time they released the B.O.P., but it just begs the question…

Et tu, FarmVille?

When will FarmVille release the Mighty Plantation? What are they afraid of anyway? The 24 x 24 Mighty Plantation is still listed as “Coming Soon!”. Unfortunately, Americans have enough important stuff tagged as “Coming Soon!”. Health care reform, economic recovery, decreased dependence on foreign oil, a plan for Afghanistan and Iraq are all similarly labeled as “Coming Soon!”. Americans have run out of patience in general. Must we also be forced to wait for the Mighty Plantation?

The answer is a resounding, and conspiratorial YES! To understand the conspiracy you must know some things about Bumble. Bumble has a few hobbies. Among Bumble’s favorite activities are FarmVille and policing pundits. Often Bumble likes to flip between MSNBC and Fox news to watch just how differently each network reports the days events. During the early afternoon it isn’t as obvious. After 8 pm, when the “news editorial” shows air the difference in slant becomes more overt. Olberman vs. Bill O’Reilly is the biggest discrepancy in news coverage since the Chicago Daily Tribune reported “Dewey Defeats Truman” back in ’48. Sadly, in the Olberman vs. O’Reilly battle it isn’t clear which one is the Tribune.

What is clear is that cable news shows allow the media to influence public opinion like never before. So after a day of harvesting and twelve RedBulls, Bumble is nearing a full blown tizzy. Could it be that FarmVille is also being influenced by punditry? Can politics be playing a part in why they have yet to release the Mighty Plantation? Again, the answer is a big fat conspiratorial YES!

Zynga is holding off for one simple reason. Allowing Bumble to have a 24 x 24 farm would possibly make his plantation…

Too Big To Fail!

Break up Bumble's Farm!

Yup, you heard it from Bumble first. On Friday, November 6th Senator Bernie Sanders from Vermont introduced the “Too Big to Fail, Too Big to Exist Act of 2009″. The act is nearly two pages long, so Bumble hasn’t actually read it. But Bumble assumes it pertains to his FarmVille farm.

Public opinion is wavering on whether or not institutions can be too big for the public good. As we have seen, when the really big financial institutions are in trouble the effects can be catastrophic to the economy. Bailouts were deemed necessary to preserve the functioning of the market.

But really… Bumble’s farm?!?

Good consiparcy theories involve latinos!

Bumble employs one latino migrant worker and a goat! Hopefully, FarmVille will not wait to see the outcome of the current act before nutting up and releasing the Mighty Plantation. Sure, there may be other reasons for the delay in the release, but Bumble is skeptical. Just a week after the introduction of the Too Big To Exist act, FarmVille went with the soft launch of just the Big Ole Plantation. Coincidence, or Lou Dobbs level manic conspiracy theory?

Whatever the reason for the delay, Bumble’s farm is packed to it’s borders. The Big Ole Plantation just isn’t going to cut it. Bumble needs living space! His critters are cramped into pens unfit for livestock. 20 cows to a Dairy Farm? Madness! The small pond is over run with fish and ducks. Bumble must act soon, with or without the launch of the Mighty Plantation.

Klaus demands the Large Pond!

Bumble urges FarmVille to ignore the punditry and politics. Release the Mighty Plantation now! If it doesn’t come soon, Bumble will have to take matters into his own hands…

Bumble and General Cabra eye the Sudetenland...